Relax Already! It's a Massage, Not a Medical Procedure

For those of us living with chronic illness, self-care can be a double-edged sword. Take a massage, for example. What’s supposed to be a relaxing experience can often feel like just another medical procedure. If you’ve ever found yourself on a massage table, tense and unable to relax, you're not alone. I’ve been there too. Let’s explore why this happens and how we can start enjoying the soothing touch of a massage.

I have very vivid memories of my first few massaged. I’m lying on a massage table, soft music playing in the background, the scent of lavender in the air. The therapist begins, and instead of melting into the table, my body stiffens. My mind races. Every touch feels invasive. Instead of relaxing, I'm bracing myself, as if anticipating the sting of a needle or the cold touch of a stethoscope.

This response was all too common for me after spending decades navigating the medical system. When you’ve had countless medical procedures, it’s hard to differentiate between the clinical touch of a doctor and the therapeutic touch of a massage therapist. My body and mind had been trained to respond with tension and anxiety, making it difficult to relax and enjoy a massage.

For a long time, I couldn’t distinguish between a nice, relaxing massage and a medical procedure. To me, lying on that table felt like being exposed and vulnerable, in the hands of someone else that I needed to trust. It wasn’t easy to overcome, but through trial and error (and therapy), I discovered some effective strategies that helped me finally relax and enjoy massages.

Here are four tips that might help you too:

1. Communicate with Your Therapist

Before your session starts, have an open conversation with your massage therapist. Let them know about your medical history and your feelings of anxiety. A good therapist will understand and adjust their approach, ensuring you feel comfortable and in control throughout the session.

2. Choose the Right Environment

Find a massage therapist and a setting that feels safe and comforting. This might mean choosing a spa with private rooms, soft lighting, and calming music. The right environment can make a big difference in how relaxed you feel.

3. Talk to a Mental Health Professional

If your anxiety about massages is deeply rooted in past medical experiences, it might help to talk to a mental health professional. They can work with you to heal from those experiences, address these fears and develop coping strategies to make relaxation easier.

4. Start with Shorter Sessions

If the idea of a full-length massage feels overwhelming, start with shorter sessions. This allows your body to gradually get used to the experience without feeling too exposed or vulnerable. Over time, as you become more comfortable, you can extend the length of your sessions.

Learning to relax during a massage when you have a history of medical procedures is a process. It takes time and patience, but it’s worth it. By taking small steps and practising these tips, you can retrain your body and mind to enjoy the therapeutic benefits of a massage. Remember, a massage is a gift to yourself – a moment of peace and care that you deserve. Relax already, it’s a massage, not a medical procedure.

P.S.

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